Why is it that many of us let the few negative words from our past taint our experiences moving forward? Why do we let the bad push away the good?
I am thinking of how this happens to us when we are faced with a new opportunity, specifically a career opportunity.
The scenario goes something like this, you prepare for and interview for a new position. You are a bit nervous, but you do know that you are qualified. You do know that you are absolutely the right person for this position. The interview goes beautifully and within a week you are offered the job. You gleefully accept.
All of a sudden, out of nowhere in creeps self doubt. All of a sudden you remember that one bad review you had five years ago. Or the way off base assessment you received from a peer.
You start thinking crazy thoughts like, “What if I mess this up?” “What if I can’t do the job?” Basically you are thinking, “What if I am not good enough?”
Why would someone hire you if you were unqualified, not good enough or likely to screw things up? Seriously, who would do that?
Change can trigger uncertainty and uncertainty triggers insecurity. This paves the way for those old negative thoughts. Stop this as soon as it starts. Don’t beat yourself up for allowing a negative thought to come into your mind; don’t be angry with yourself for being human.
Just be prepared. Save compliments that customers and co-workers send to you. Keep the reviews that have made you proud. Save announcements from when you have been promoted or added to the team or thanked for your hard work. Use these items to push back those negative thoughts. Perhaps you can even call someone who has worked with you and seen you at your best. Speaking with someone who knows how good you are can be very restorative.
Keep at it until your strength and confidence returns.